Sunday, January 25, 2015

Something Out There

Do you ever get that feeling in your gut that something is terribly, terribly wrong?  I do, and my gut has proven itself so many times in the past, that I can't help but trust it.

Last Thursday I was snowshoeing in the bush.  I'd gone through the lower field and then up the old ski hill into the woods.  I hiked along the edge of the upper field and continued deep into the trees.  Soon, I was following the river up toward Martin Lake.  Last winter I happened upon a sweet little waterfall and rapids and wanted to find the spot again.

Going in, I was slightly apprehensive as it's about an hour hike in, which is putting me at a distance from home that I'm not entirely comfortable with while alone.

I was following my old tracks when I came across a big moose track.  Moose punch deep holes in the snow with their long, long legs.  I saw where the moose had stopped to munch on some hemlock, then veered off my track.

Next, I came to a wolf or coyote track.  They are everywhere in the fields, and don't often give me pause, but this far out, I was a little concerned.

Hearing the rapids, I pushed on.  I was winding my way through the thick hemlocks, trying to figure out how I'd made it down to the riverbank the last time I'd been out here.  The trees seemed impenetrable.  I said out loud, "how in the world did I get down there last time!?".  And then, I heard a "WHOOOOOSH" sound, and it filled the silence all around me.  I don't know what it was,  and I'm not even going to make any guesses, but all of the tiny bits of apprehension I'd felt up to that moment hit me HARD.  My heart was pounding and I turned and followed my path back as fast as I could move.

I feel there is something out by those rapids.  There is definite and obvious animal activity - big animals.  It is something I don't want to meet face to face and I'm certain it wants nothing to do with me.

There have been two other occasions I've been out that way and felt a presence.  Once last winter and once last spring.  I get a feeling in my gut that something isn't right every time I'm there (and yet, I keep returning...).  A feeling in my gut that makes me move away, turn back and not linger.  Like I said, I'm not making any guesses, and it could be lots of different things, but it's something.

Sunday, January 4, 2015

Into the Woods

Today I walked into the woods in the blowing wind and snow.  In the field, the wind was wicked, but upon entering the woods, everything was hushed and the snow feel thickly, but gently, all around.


When the snow is falling heavily on the trees, everything is lovely.  Everything is art.

Tall trees arch like cathedrals.  Snow nestles on pine and spruce branches just so.  Everywhere I look, all I see is something perfectly beautiful.  It's more than I can describe in words, these perfect hikes.  Days like these feed my soul.


Saturday, January 3, 2015

Keep Your Chin Up

I hope you know what if feels like to have someone be consistently proud of you.   I hope you have someone in your life that can always impart a quiet wisdom, that can bolster your confidence and build you up from the inside out.  I hope that there is someone in your life that can make you feel better just for having been in their presence.  A person that affirms what you know in your soul to be true.
I know what that feels like, and I am grateful everyday.
I have been feeling particularly defeated lately.  My saving grace has been my Grandad's voice in my ear -
I am.  And I will.  Because his pride in me is a light that I refuse to let be extinguished.
My Grandad and my daughter, Clare on Christmas Eve 2014.